Sweetbitter by Stephanie Danler(Book Review)

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Bildungsroman:

A literary genre that follows the moral growth of a protagonist from youth to their adulthood. Basically the fancy schmancy way to say a “coming of age” story.

But bildungsroman sounds more nifty and smart.

 

Being the uneducated slug that I am, I first discovered this word while reading a New York Times article that interviews Stephanie Danler. The writer of this very bitter, very melodramatic book. Sweetbitter.

First I’m going to talk about the positives. Because I’m trying to be less of a troll and more of an optimist about the books I’ve read this year so far.

The writing is amazing. There are passages that really had me beside myself. Danler is a word wizard.

I really loved the take on food. She used words I had never thought of using to describe food before, but that’s just because I’m uncultured. Someone else might say otherwise. This isn’t a typical chick-lit. It’s sort of dark and doesn’t have any whimsical aspects about it.

What I don’t like about the book.

Tess is a hot ass mess. She’s very unlikable because not only is she a dunderhead, but she kinda has no personality. Everyone around her is more interesting.  Pretentious, but leaps and bounds more interesting. 300 plus pages and that dumpster-fire of an ending, I still have no idea of who Tess is.

Maybe that was the point of the story? Tess’s story ends so abruptly and chaotic. And I could go further into depth about this but I don’t like spoilery reviews. Tess made a lot of dumb decisions.

Tess is an unlikable female character and with hindsight that’s a great thing. I think as far as Tess as an individual, that’s the only thing about her that’s cool. She’s unlikeable but I think Danler could have given her more depth. Tess’s personality only shines when she’s reacting to people and her environment. Everything about Tess is contingent upon other people. That was my biggest problem.

And the weird love triangle. Mess. The last thing about this story that was so nettlesome was that there wasn’t a plot.

As I was reading a lot of the reviews i saw how people were glowing about how great it was that they could relate to Tess and her friends while working in the food industry.

I’ve been a server before and I didn’t do drugs or sleep with my coworkers. I mean I saw everyone else doing it, so maybe it is really a thing for the chefs, waitresses, and bartenders to bone each other.

I’m also a nihilistic ass-hat so I’m the outlier.

3/5 Stars

I would recommend this book as a vacay read. I wouldn’t say its light in content, but it’s easy to read. If you’re into profound prose and reading about food and waitresses, then this is your thing. It’s not a long book either. I most certainly would buy another book by Danler.

 

Animals~ Emma Jane Unsworth (Book Review)

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This isn’t chick-lit. I knew it wouldn’t be when I read the first page. The first passage is such a punch in the throat. I knew I’d be in for a wild ride. Animals is the book all women past the age of 25 should read. Most stories that are centered around a female protag, she’s usually very young and experiencing many things for the first time.

But what happens when you’ve got a lot of nicks on your bedpost and all of that experience turns into bad habits? What happens when she finally loses herself?

Emma Jane Unsworth has given us an answer, dear world.

This book touches the fabric of adulthood and needles the fuck out it. We all like to pretend that we have our shit together in our late 20s but do we really?

Laura has a toxic friend named Tyler who might as well be her soul mate. They get into all kinds of trouble but Laura has found the man of her dreams who wants her to ditch her party life. By society’s standards, Laura and Tyler are too old for the shit that they get into but I think it’s refreshing to read about older girls living it up and not conforming to the expectations of femininity.

Love, marriage, and kids shouldn’t be the end all of our lives. Neither three are the shining beacons of success.

Unsworth’s writing is blunt, vulgar, honest, and confident. Animals is just hilariously brilliant in its truth telling about the thoughts we women have.

I don’t really know how to label this book. It could be literary but I feel like it doesn’t beat around the bush enough to fit that niche. It’s definitely not a romance nor a drama. It doesn’t fit anywhere. Unsworth has carved her own path and I can’t wait to pick up more of her books.

I would love to see this as a movie or a TV show.

What I didn’t like about this book is sometimes things got too chaotic and Laura is a bit of an unreliable narrator. When she blacks out, the reader blacks out with her. When things are happening to fast for her, the reader feels just as disoriented. Now that’s not necessarily bad. I really felt like I was in Laura’s head but I did get lost as bit. It can become a bit redundant in the middle portion of the book.

The ending was by far the best thing about this story. Laura really has personal growth throughout the book and it really shows on the last page. I think it’s debatable that Tyler had a bit of a change too.

TLDR: If you like reading about unconventional women doing drugs, being sweaty and watching people taking alcohol up the ass then this is the book for you.

Also I’ve read a couple of books that I haven’t written reviews for just yet. Hopefully I will get around to them. I’m currently reading Sweetbitter.

A Curious Beginning~ Book Review

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This book could’ve been an easy five stars BUT the author did not SINK THE SHIP. Instead, she tortured me for 300+ pages with their cat and mouse and while I enjoy a slow burn THIS IS WAS DELICIOUSLY AGONIZING.  I’ve never been so mad at an ending but I get that it was intentional. The Curious Beginning is the first installment of the Veronica Speedwell mysteries. While it doesn’t end on a cliffhanger, you definitely will want to go pick up the second book to see what mess Veronica and Stoker will get themselves into.

Veronica Speedwell is a spinster of sorts and after the death of her aunt, and criminal breaks into her house and threatens her life. She is then saved by a baron who opens a window to an adventure she never thought she needed.

I loved this book so much. The characters have so much chemistry and Veronica, while brilliant and hilarious, is a flawed character. She’s very hasty and brazen, while these are good qualities, I can see that later being a huge problem. The banter alone could’ve sustained me. To hell with the plot. The plot actually was background noise to me. The whole time I just wanted Veronica and Stoker to kiss. Deanna Raybourn is a master at wit and her writing, at first was a little verbose, but it all came together eventually.

I’m usually hesitant with books that start off with the heroin and hero annoying each other. That dynamic can become toxic really quick and unbelievable but that wasn’t this kind of story. Stoker and Veronica are endeared by each other from the beginning even though they bicker. It’s light hearted and Stoker comes to accept Veronica for who she is. He doesn’t force her to compromise her personality he just lets her be bold and crass. I could not have asked for better in a couple. Usually it’s the other way around in romance. Brooding guy reminds the girl how much she annoys him and cuts at her self esteem a bit by being emotionally vacant.  Nope. Not this time around and I must thank Mrs. Raybourn for that.

TLDR; This book sets up for a greater story and the romance takes a back seat. Again, I love slow burns but I don’t like it when my feelings are played with for an entire book only to have to wait for the second one. THAT’S JUST MY PERSONAL OPINION someone else might enjoy it.

If you are expecting the ship to bump butts, you might have to wait.

4.5/5

Juliet by Anne Fortier REVIEW

FullSizeRender (54)Juliet was a cute, simple, fun, and light read. Anne Fortier’s writing is lyrical but not pretentious. Jules is a very likeable protagonist, heroine but it takes a long ass time before she falls for hero. Overall, this book was safe. I wouldn’t know who to recommend this book to. It’s not exactly romantic? The romance takes a back seat.

What really hurt this book, I believe was the time jump. I didn’t care about Romeo or Guilietta’s romance because we all know how that story ends. When Alessandro and Jules finally end up, it’s honestly all I wanted to read about. I wanted them to both solve a mystery together and get into tons of shenanigans. That didn’t happen.

Perhaps I’m not very taken by this book because it was a random pick up for .99. I went into this book blind. I didn’t know what I was getting myself into. Awkward is probably the best way to call the middle portion of the book. Jules spends 40% of the story fumbling around. Nothing really happens until the last 50 pages of the book.

I couldn’t exactly believe the whole past lives lovers aspect of the story. I didn’t make sense to me. Were they reincarnated? There’s no traces of magical realism to make this point in the plot sellable. It didn’t feel magical and everyone just sort of believed it? Everyone went along with this destined lovers idea….

Janet is hyper critical of it all but…..she soon believes it too.

Juliet is mindless fun. It’s a nice airplane read. It wasn’t by any means amazing or life changing. I would most def read a sequel to it just because I love Jules and Alessandro. Their banter was sweet and the chemistry was there from jump.

TLDR; If you just want something easy to read, this is the book for you. It drags in the middle but once things pick up it never stops. The story starts off strong and Jules seeps cuteness.

The Devil of Nanking~ Book Review

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Haunting. Terrifying. Beautifully strange and amazing. Mo Hayder has become my new favorite author. The Devil of Nanking is electrifying from start to finish. From the very first page the gore never stops. This book made me feel like I needed a nice hot shower. In a good way. The narration was disturbingly delicious, the plot never waned, and I loved how morally ambiguous the characters are.

No one in this book is a good person necessarily and I loved this the most. Every character, even the unimportant ones, have interesting layers to their personality and why they do the things that they do.

Grey, one of the protagonists is noticeably off her rocker and I cannot stress how much I love reading about warped characters. Especially from their perspective. I enjoyed Lolita for the same reason.

Chongming, survivor of the Nanking massacre and the catalyst for this story is also very interesting. I can’t talk too much about his character without spoiling the plot. Actually, it’s pretty hard to give this book a review without dropping a spoiler. Which I won’t do so I will say this. If you’re into Gillian Flynn and Haruki Murakami then this is right up your alley.

TLDR; It’s bloody, strange, and eerie. The Devil of Nanking is an experience. It’s beyond the realm of simple story telling.

goodreads: frootbatte

twitter: caligulazhorse

Why The Coldest Girl In Coldtown sucks and what is exactly happening to the paranormal YA genre…..?

Wow and I thought I would never encounter another book that would fill me with so much rage. I allowed myself to gorge on this stupid shit show. It wasn’t the writing. The writing was fine. A bit awkward at times but it sufficed which is why I didn’t give this book one star.

Holly Black, I’ve heard, is supposedly fantastic. So I stepped outside of the norm and allowed myself to read this YA. The Coldest Girl in Coldtown lacks so much spirit and sincerity. Depth and heart are clearly missing from every facet. It makes the gorgeous prose meaningless. The words in this book are simply words. This book had to have simply been a shot at the money making machine that is paranormal YA. I love vampires. I truly do but I think pop culture and how our society interprets their myth has destroyed the magic. Vampires just aren’t cool anymore.

MAYBE had I read this when I was fourteen I might feel differently (doubt it). Tana lacked so much tone. Gavriel was dull. Aidan was a try hard bad boy. The only good thing I loved about this book was Valentina. I loved the inclusivity of a transwoman.

There were times when I thought it would get better but nothing interesting happens up till page 300. The way Black writes gore and violence is superb and I would love to have that translated into an adult book. Paranormal YA in general is so lacking. It’s almost as if the writers are purposely dumbing down their writing.

Let me tell you future paranormal YA writers and published writers that wish to explore the realm; you don’t have to water down the story. Your plot can be complex and meaningful. Teenagers want to read things that challenge them. Or if you’re really out of touch with the demographic, then don’t bother at all. Paranormal YA deserves just as much hard work as any adult fantasy genre.

It’s a shame to me that writers don’t feel like they have to try hard and be thoughtful when putting together a YA paranormal story. I’m not saying Black didn’t try. She probably tried her damned hardest. I wouldn’t know because I haven’t read anything else by her. I intend to and maybe I can return to this post later and give a better review on what went wrong with this book. I think publishing companies should be held accountable too. Stop allowing paranormal YA to become over saturated with sub par work.

Contemporary YA is amazing so why shouldn’t fantasy/paranormal? Do better YA writers…..

The Coldest Girl in Coldtown could’ve really gone there. It could’ve really been smart but it was just a meshed version of True Blood and Interview With a Vampire squished up into a convoluted mess. This could’ve been really original and of its own. 2/5 stars.

I read The Diabolic before this but I don’t plan on reading anymore niche YA for a long time.

TLDR; If Twilight was your jam, then this might be up your alley. While it isn’t the most original book, I see how it could be entertaining for someone who seeks it’s genre. The gore is a bit shocking for YA, but I enjoyed that aspect of it. The vampires in this book do actually do vampire things and that’s always enjoyable.

goodreads: @frootbatte

The Night Circus (A beautiful snooze fest) A Review

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The Night Circus, like The Bees, was more of an experience than pure entertainment. The writing is lyrical but sometimes kind of awkward, the shifting perspectives doesn’t really give the reader a chance to become attached to any of the characters, but I was pleased.

When I first started the book, I was a little anxious. This book is incredibly slow and I get that all of the world building was necessary. Every chapter was contingent upon another so I wouldn’t go as far as to say that this book was blah blah blah and dull. Every detail is intentional and perhaps, had I been looking for that type of story, this book would’ve worked out better for me. It was hard to rate this book because it was good, but it took way too long to get to the meat of it all. I struggled between three or four stars, but I went ahead and gave it 4.5/5.

This book is beautifully campy. The romance doesn’t really happen until like 250 pages in which I think worked. Marco and Celia don’t have insta-love but the gaps in time made it come off that way. I don’t think the reader got enough insight into why Marco and Celia love each other outside of their bond. Which is a forced connection.

My biggest problem with the book is the confusing magic system and the overall dramatic idea of the ‘duel’ between Celia and Marco. Erin Morgenstern does a good job at with-holding information because a lot of stuff that happens is downright convoluted. And I think that was an intentional decision she made. To keep the story just as vague and mysterious as the circus itself. That could just be me excusing very vague writing and bad storytelling, but I will give Morgenstern the benefit of the doubt.

I gave the book 4.5 because it is her debut novel and I would like to read future published works by her. The overall story was very imaginative and different from anything I’ve ever read. Next to Laline Paull’s The Bees.

TLDR; This book is worth it if you’re into a prose and complex detail. Also if you simply enjoy books about circuses. When the romance does develop its amazingly well done, if you ignore how Marco treats Isobel (but that’s a spoiler I won’t get into).

I can’t give a full review without spoilers so check this book out for yourself! I encourage.

Goodreads: @frootbatte

Rome In Love is a pile of garbage (Review)

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Who would’ve thought that I would find a book worse than The Book Of Speculation. Never would I have dreamed that I would one day find a book worthy of one star, but I did. One star books really do exist. Rome in Love by Anita Hughes is hands down the worst book that I’ve ever read. The premise was cute. I was sold on the homage to Audrey Hepburn. I love chick-lit. So I gave it a go.

But let me tell you…..It took me a week to get through this mess. 300 pages took me a week. The writing is down-right atrocious. How the hell did this book get by an editor!? This books reads like a first draft. A collection of ideas that needed to be fleshed out.

She saw this. She saw that. She remembered this. She remembered that.

And the creepy emphasis on everyone having creamy white milky skin……

I should’ve played a drinking game for every time someone saw something, or remembered a thing. Hughes’ writing reads like a long check list. A slow train wreck. The story was so unimaginative. Sure the premise was kinda cheesy but it could’ve worked. But nope. One dimensional characters and one dimensional writing ruined it.

AND LET ME TALK ABOUT AUDREY HEPBURN’S LETTERS!!

They didn’t even read like actual fucking letters. Nobody writes letters like full story narrations.

The passages switched settings so often, I would get lost in where the characters were. They’d be in a hotel in one paragraph then a space break later they’re in a cafe. I’m convinced this book only had one draft. Check lists and footnotes. That’s how I can perfectly sum up Hughes’ writing.

She has a lot of published books. I wonder if they all read like this. I won’t be making any efforts to find out. I will never in my life pick up another book by Anita Hughes.

I also noticed that Rome in Love shares the same publishers as The Book Of Speculation.

Maybe there’s a pattern.

TLDR; Don’t read this garbage. I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy. BUT IF YOU WANT TO BE ENTERTAINED BY HOW BAD IT IS THEN KNOCK YOURSELF OUT!!

Eight Hundred Grapes (800 slaps to my face) ~ Book Review

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Eight Hundred Nopes–you know a story is off to a bad start and dull as fuck all when the names of the characters escape you 100 pages in. Often, I found myself flipping a few odd pages back just to help me remember who was who. That’s not good at all. The shit thing is, Laura Dave’s writing isn’t bad. It’s actually pretty clever but once again good writing cannot save a lackluster story.

Maybe this book wasn’t a good introduction to Dave? Because I saw hope neatly packed within her prose. I have a strong feeling in my stomach that that’s exactly what it is.

There’s Eight Hundred shitty things wrong with this book though. The plot, for one, consists of everyone being stupidly dishonest with one another, everyone is having some kind of affair or on the edge of one…….wait what am I saying. There wasn’t any plot. Just one hella of huge big miscommunication.

Eight Hundred Miscommunications.

Eight Hundred Ways To Avoid Your Problems.

EVERYTHING could’ve easily been solved with some open honest dialogue. There’s nothing wrong with miscommunications in stories but they have to be cleverly done. Not just random plot devices to stress out the protagonist. The Fords were forgettable, annoying, and carried a blood line of fucking stupidity.

Hate hate hate hate hate……

But there were a lot of moments that saved it for me. Enough to give this soap opera three stars. I think Dave did a good job at wrapping everything up. I was so happy when it was over…I could finally move on from the pettiness. The only person I liked in this entire shit storm was Jacob. That’s who I wanted to read about. His super smart girlfriend too.

I will give Laura Dave another try because I honestly could see myself enjoying her story telling. This book just seemed really messy? I just don’t like messy characters that can’t solve easy problems for themselves.

TLDR; I honestly don’t have much else to say about this book other than it’s meant for mindless reading. This would be a good book to read while traveling. It’s not long, the prose isn’t pretentious. It’s very straight to the point, be it all the points are pretty dumb and predictable.

The Bees by Laline Paull~ Review

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I rate books based on the way that they make me feel. I’ve read things that I know are relevant culturally and have hated them (i.e. Love by Toni Morrison). The Bees is similar in that, while I enjoyed it far more than any Toni Morrison book that I’ve read, it didn’t leave me contemplating my life. The Bees is a great work of fiction and I honestly see it being referenced years from now as a classic. It stands out and stays true to the nature of honey bees. The bees in this book aren’t human and the reader is hyper aware of this throughout the entire book. They don’t think like humans, they don’t operate like humans…save for the theme of love at the end of the book. But that’s spoilery territory.

For me, The Bees was more of an experience than mindless entertainment. It was incredibly new and refreshing from anything I’ve ever read. Laline Paull’s writing is beautiful and lyrical. While I did give this book three stars on Goodreads, I am anticipating another novel from Paull. The Bees wasn’t an amazing roller coaster ride but I appreciate it for its very different perspective and tone. Surprisingly, it wasn’t that hard to imagine the story either. It kind of gave me James And The Giant Peach vibes. Or Disney’s A Bug’s Life.

This book deserves more buzz and I encourage everyone to step outside of their comfort zone and experience the story of Flora 717. You will also learn a thing or two about honey bees.

Maybe if I had read it before ACOMAF I’d be a more enthusiastic about it.

TLDR; If you love challenging yourself or simply enjoy unconventional stories then this book is the way to go. It lulls in some parts but you won’t be bored with the ton of information you will consume about bees. Very easy to read and not saturated in idle details.

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